Before You Resolve to Lose Weight, Read This

Ahhh the New Year! So many resolutions flitting about on the socials, in the breakroom and the like. There is a hope with the New Year, an expectancy in the air. Just the feeling of getting a new planner hints at the promise we find in new beginnings. If you, like many of us, are ready to turn the page into a great new habit, jump on in!

But wait. What’s that? You want to lose weight? Laudable, I guess. Important, I suppose. Or is it? Before you dive headlong into an expensive CrossFit experience or pilates package, do a quick review to see if this particular resolution is right for you. 

1. Investigate your reasons

When my mom got sick, I had every reason to evaluate my current lifestyle, to see if I could make changes that would last. Instead, I ended up restricting my own eating in a futile attempt to “control” something in my life. Guess what? Control is an illusion. I don’t need it. I need Jesus. I need the Holy Spirit. You see where I’m going with this. The point is, sometimes we lie to ourselves about why we are making “weight” and food restriction, in particular, a goal in itself. If you feel that a radical change is necessary for your life, and weight is a primary reason, look BEHIND that reason. Lurking in the darkness is the real thing that’s bothering you. There is no “good” or “bad” here, only honesty. God has a way of revealing to us the areas in our lives where we fall short. I don’t mean in a “naughty” way, I mean in a false idol way. Honing your gym bod, and researching every macro of your carrot soup may not look like a golden calf to you. But when you place these things above Him, becoming something you find meaning/belonging in, then watch out. Attachment is a normal part of life, but don’t kid yourself, God doesn’t dictate your “ideal body size.” He doesn’t care about your gym membership or the fact that you have a muffin top. The practical question is this, if God loves you now, you don’t have to change anything. But if you’re like me, and know God is calling your attention to unhealthy behaviors, read on.

2. Accept your awesome bod, just as it is

We all have that photo, the one where we look A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. Who cares that it’s three kids ago, or when we were in the throes of disordered eating. All it takes is one look at that photo, one comment from a well-meaning friend, “Whoa, that was YOU?” and it all comes back, the desire for something else. But you aren’t something else. You are in the shape you are in, made and formulated according to a divine plan. You are perfect. Just as you are. Knowing God’s love for you, how can you embark on a plan that’s centered around “getting back to” this mysterious ideal. It’s a mirage. The longer you seek it, the more obsessive you become. Vanity is a miserable thing. Ask me, I’ve been there! What’s better? Radical acceptance. Radical because it is so rare in today’s “bio-hacking” culture. To take a step back, look in the mirror and say, “I am beautifully and wonderfully made.” It’s God’s promise to you. So accept it. Every bit of your physical body doesn’t need to be changed in the slightest. So there. 

3. Heal the wound

Remember how I said look “behind” the reason? You very well may have an area of your life that needs attention. Put it before God. Then thou shalt Amazon! I found some great books on initiative eating that are based on love for body and food. Pulling yourself away from the dominant narrative of today’s culture is hard. But not impossible. We live at such an exciting time in social media. All types of voices are speaking out about loving yourself first, and tapping into God’s vision for self-care. Hint, it’s less about you and more about what you CAN do for others. Let God heal you. Find the tips and tools you need to begin that work. Read a book, see a therapist, whatever it will take to get you back into a God-centered mindset. You can’t lose putting him first place. 

4. Grow your confidence

We all know that one woman who, despite her shape, just has “it.” That joy in living life that, despite her size, is as bold as bright as sunlight. In fact, many men of my acquaintance have a similar vibe. Put simply, there is something to be said for being comfortable in your own skin. That, my friends, is a skill you too can acquire. How is it done? For one, there is no negative self-talk. These people shop to compliment their shape. There is no clothing in their house that beckons them to their “skinny days.” They stay active, value and enjoy food. They make connections, have friends, think of others. . .  sound familiar? Living a whole, well-rounded life, full of fruits of the spirit can get you where you should be in terms of your confidence. Take up a meditation practice, or being daily mantras–connect with your spirituality and tell a friend about it. Or better yet, start a blog! Live your life. Whenever you pass a mirror, and your eyes go right to “your problem spot” reframe your attitude immediately. Take three breaths and smile. Repeat one great thing you love about your appearance. Yes, you are more than a body–but the body you are in should be well-maintained. Only you have the key to this, and it has more to do with your attitude than it does with food.

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Hopefully, these tips will be more fun than a bucket-load of kale this New Year. Remember, celebrate your humanity by accepting yourself just as you are. Thank the creator for those legs, that hearty appetite, and that brilliant smile. Who knows, someone might as you the secret to living in victory with yourself. It starts with the father, it ends with you.